Tartışmaya katıl

YÖNETİCİLERİN DİKKATİNE!...

İşten Kaytarmanın Yöntemleri

Sık sık su içmeye gitmek, sigara molası vermek.
Mesai saatleri içinde işini yavaş yaparak fazla mesaiye kalmak. Bu sayede fazla mesai ücretinden yararlanmak.
İş ortamında o hafta oynanan maçlar gibi işdışı sohbet ortamları yaratarak çalışmaya ara vermek.
Özel günlerini (kadınlar) bahane ederek sık sık tuvalete gitmek.
Dışarıda gerçek olmayan iş görüşmeleri yaratarak, bu saatleri kişisel işlerde kullanmak.
Ailesinden, yakınlarından birinin rahatsızlığı veya ölümü gibi yalanlarla işe gelmemek.
Özellikle bankalarda "Benim uzmanlık alanım değil. Bu konuyu yeterince bilmiyorum." diyerek, işi yoğun görevlerden uzak kalmak.
Çalışma masasında kalem ve dosyaları, sandalyede veya askılıkta ceket bırakarak işyerindeymiş izlenimi vermek ama kısa süreler için çalışılan mekanı terketmek.
Yakınları vasıtasıyla telefonla acilen iş görüşmesine çağırılıyor havası vermek ve bu zamanı kişisel işleri için kullanmak.
Gizlice çalışma masasının üzerine notlar bırakarak, hayali iş randevuları bildirmek.

Başka eklemek istediğiniz var mı?

Merhaba,

Bahsettigim metni buldum.

Bilginize...

So true.....
Here are some rules to learn....



1. Never walk down the hall without a document in your hands. People with
documents in their hands look like hardworking employees heading for
important meetings. People with nothing in their hands look like they're
heading for the cafeteria. People with a newspaper in their hand look like
they're heading for the toilet. Above all, make sure you carry loads of
stuff home with you at night, thus generating the false impression that you
work longer hours than you do.

2. Use computers to look busy. Any time you use a computer, it looks like
"work" to the casual observer. You can send and receive personal email,
calculate your finances and generally have a blast without doing anything
remotely related to work. These aren't exactly the societal benefits that
the proponents of the computer revolution would like to talk about but
they're not bad either. When you get caught by your boss - and you *will*
get caught - your best defence is to claim you're teaching yourself to use
new software, thus saving valuable training
dollars.

3. Messy desk. Top management can get away with a clean desk. For the rest
of us, it looks like you're not working hard enough. Build huge piles of
documents around your workspace. To the observer, last year's work looks
the same as today's work; it's volume that counts. Pile them high and wide.
If you know somebody is coming to your cubicle, bury the document you'll
need halfway down in an existing stack and rummage for it when he/she
arrives.

4. Voice Mail. Never answer your phone if you have voice mail. People
don't call you just because they want to give you something for nothing -
they call because they want YOU to do work for THEM. That's no way to
live. Screen all your calls through voice mail. If somebody leaves a
voice mail message for you and it sounds like impending work, respond
during lunch hour when you know they're not there - it looks like you're
hardworking and conscientious even though you're being a devious weasel.
If you diligently employ the method of screening incoming calls and then
returning calls when nobody is there, this will greatly increase the odds
that the caller will give up or look for a solution that doesn't
involve you. The sweetest voice mail message you can ever hear is: "Ignore
my last message. I took care of it". If your voice mailbox has a limit on
the number of messages it can hold, make sure you
reach that limit frequently. One way to do that is to never erase
any incoming messages. If that takes too long, send yourself a few
messages. Your callers will hear a recorded message that says, "Sorry, this
mailbox is full" - a sure sign that you are a hardworking employee in high
demand.

5. Looking Impatient and Annoyed. According to George Costanza, one should
also always try to look impatient and annoyed to give your bosses the
impression that you are always busy.

6. Appear to Work Late. Always leave the office late, especially when the
boss is still around. You could read magazines and storybooks that you
always wanted to read but have no time until late before leaving. Make
sure you walk past the boss' room on your way out. Send important emails
at unearthly hours (e.g. 9:35pm, 75am, etc...) and during public
holidays.

7. Creative Sighing for Effect. Sigh loudly when there are many people
around, giving the impression that you are very hard pressed.

8. Stacking Strategy. It is not enough to pile lots of documents on the
table. Put lots of books on the floor etc... Can always borrow from
library. Thick computer manuals are the best.

9. Build Vocabulary. Read up on some computer magazines and pick out all
the jargon and new products. Use it freely when in conversation with
bosses. Remember: They don't have to understand what you say, but you sure
sound impressive.

10. * MOST IMPORTANTLY: DON'T forward this to your boss by mistake!!!

Merhaba,

Bir arkadastan bir ara "isten kaytarma yollari"yla ilgili matrak bir mail gelmisti. Ingilizce. Bir bakayim ona, buldugumda buraya koyayim...

Selamlar,

Izzet

Bu veriler Almanyada işçilere yönelik yapılan bir anketin değerlendirmesinin sonucu.

Kritik konu şu:
Amirlere "astlarınız nasıl kaytarıyorlar?" diye sormamışlar, astlara "nasıl kaytarıyorsunuz?" diye sormuşlar.

Benim değerlendirmem yeterince Türk işçiye sorulmamış!!!

Bence durum daha da orijinal olabilirdi!..

Katkılardan önce buradaki bilgilerin teorik mi, yoksa ampirik mi olduğunu çok merak ediyorum.

Selamlar